“ALL I EVER WANTED WAS A SWEET LIFE” RIP LIL DEE

This Blog is inspired by Lil Dee “From Time Freestyle (Youtube).


This is going to be an emotional one that fills me with frustration, anger and hope…
Many of us are quick to jump on a bandwagon or judge a book by its cover and not its contents. One perception many get wrong is the thought I am from a Posh/Rich family. This is because I come across well spoken so people immediately assume I never grew up on the roads or never had to struggle in life. I was not raised with a silver spoon.


“I remember dem times we had to save up for clothes, no we stay fresh with the Nike on my clothes”.


I grew up as a council estate kid from Tower Hamlets. At one point I went to a primary school where I was the only black person in the whole school so please imagine that during the early 90’s. My mother was a cleaner earning below minimum wage. I remember as a 14 year old I had to work on a market stall earning £15 per week. It was this money I was able to buy my first Nikes!

The message I am trying to say even though I had obstacles to face I chose to work a evening job and focus on my education as early as 14 years of age. The reason I started this blog the way I did is to show how many of us don’t have the options nor can we see the hope in education and earning a minimum wage.

“I grew up on the roads fam, got a lot bros but I am in it on my own”.


I came across the tragic story of a young 17 year old who lost his life after a Police chase in South Manchester in 2019. This story which was reported by the Manchester Evening News reported how Dean Simpson was in the passenger seat as the car crashed into a building. While I believe the driver survived life threatening injuries while Dean Simpson died. This was a young person whom loved his music and clothes and his death sparked a wave of emotions which shows despite the negative things he was caught up in, this young person must have been a good soul to be loved by so many who gave flowers and expressed their discomfort at the loss of this young life.


“People said I was a bad Pickni but from a young age I’ve been round like a frisbi”

Dean Simpson also known as “Lil Dee” has a audio track to the “From Time” instrumental and when I say it makes you think it makes you think! I took the time to listen and absorb his lyrics. I am not sure if many would agree but for me his raps lyrics try to win the respect of his peers while he tells you real life perspectives, although glorifies the trap life he also lets you know the reasons for his decisions and the state of affairs of the young people today. One of his lyrics he says people said he was a bad Pickni but what do you expect if your passed round like a Frisbi! I can only assume this has something to do with Care or being neglected by society.

“Its got me cutting down the grass fam so I can see the snakes, nowadays you dont know whats real or fake fam”

As you start to delve into his lyrics you start to see this was a Streetwise kid who appeared knowledgeable about the streets. But regardless of how smart you are it can be hard to tell the real from the fake!

“I got to know all them all fine though, got to keep it more than 99 though”

Another lyric told me he knew on these streets you got to keep it more than 99, keep it 100 (real) or in my own interpretation I believe this could mean the cost of trust in people is worth less than a 99p store so you got to keep on point.

“I aint got time for a Hope so I am out here paper chasin”

As you start to get to the end of the track I am not sure if Lil Dee knows but his lyrics reveals the state of mind for some young people now. Many feel there is no hope for a better life so choose the Traplife! Its crazy that young people aged 16 and 17 can feel there is no hope when they have their whole lives ahead of them… What society are we living in where someone this young believes there is no Hope… Its deep.

I got to do whats best, fuck that I got to do whats next”

So many young people are not interested in doing whats best for them and their lives moving forward. The attitude is Fuck that whats next ? Wheres my next meal ticket, while some is where is my next bed to sleep going to come from… As I learn more about the Care System and the links many of these young people have with Broken Homes you slowly start to realize where all the mess starts and that is from not having a secure foundation such as a home. This is the only thing I had that was different from other council estate kids. Although my home was not perfect it was still a home. Some young people dont even have that! So many are forced to worry where their next meal is coming or have ambitions to hustle and trap to secure a fat meal…

“On the block all the time trying to get a Fat Mill”…

I listen to this track and continue to have it on repeat! I will leave you with the last lyric of the song which summed it all for me. All he ever wanted was sweet life. A young and healthy teenager who could have easily been good at Sports or Business studies, but has chosen to run the block like an athlete…


“All I ever wanted was a sweet life, Now Lil Dee going hard on the street life, fam yo its that peak, Niggas at that beat, I be on the block like an athelete”

This Blog is in memory of Dean Simpson aka Lil Durk

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